Well, well, well. Hellsongs are about to release a new cd and
I gotta admit, it’s ridiculous but it’s also ridiculously fun. What’s that? You don’t know who Hellsongs are? Well, if you enjoy giving the Richard Cheese discs a spin or two, then you need to keep reading…

Hellsongs fashion themselves as “LoungeMetal” and what they do is reinterpret metal classics as acoustic/electronic songs more fit for coffee shop waifery. Remember when Tori Amos released that cover album which featured a cover of Slayer’s “Raining Blood”? Yeah? Well, it’s exactly like that, except that Hellsongs actually make it listenable while making the songs their own, a la Richard Cheese minus the Vegas lounge kitch. Over 10 tracks these Swedes manage to offer their own spin on Slayer, Guns -n- Roses, Skid Row, as well as a mom-approved take on Pantera.

Look, I’m not saying this is something you’ll put in heavy rotation, but it is a fun listen. It also makes for an entertaining album to put on when you have company and watch as they have an internal struggle trying to figure out just what it is they are listening to.

Hellsongs – Youth Gone Wild
Skid Row – Youth Gone Wild
(tell me the Hellsongs version, with that chorus, wouldn’t have been a perfect song for an 80’s movie…maybe the fair scene in Lost Boys)

Hellsongs – Walk
Pantera – Walk

Hellsongs Official Site, Hellsongs on myspace


Perhaps I was just young, but there seemingly was a time when Tori Amos felt edgy and just a little brash. Over the years, though, she has mellowed considerably and I’ve filed her in the “artists I used to like whose new albums I check out out of politeness only but I doubt I’ll ever actually like anything they ever do again” folder.


I think the opening paragraph of their bio tells you everything you need to know about this band: “What’s black and white and can crush you like a bug? A piano. These monsters weigh anywhere from 300 lbs for a small upright, to four or even five times that for a concert grand. So why do artists let them sound so wimpy? KRISTEENYOUNG wants the piano to kick your ass. Their new album, Music for Strippers, Hookers, and the Odd On-Looker, feels like it was born in the boxing ring, not some sun-dappled Laurel Canyon living room.”

Born in a boxing ring is a great way to put it. Kristeen doesn’t so much “play” the piano as she does “beat it into submission”. The resulting sound is like heavy-metal with a piano. Vocally, Kristeen has a multi-octave range that she’s not afraid to use. Ordinarily, I’m not to keen on the vocal stylings she uses but together with the music they make it work perfectly.

Maybe I’m just getting old, but KRISTEENYOUNG are edgy, brash and dramatic…and Essential Listening.

KRISTEENYOUNG – Comfort Is Never A Goal
KRISTEENYOUNG – He’s Sickened By My Crude Emotion

KRISTEENYOUNG’s Official Site, KRISTEENYOUNG on myspace, Buy Music for Strippers, Hookers, and the Odd On-Looker